I haven't been to see my midwife in over a month. I was supposed to be seeing her every two weeks (which I don't think is necessary anyways at this time) but she was sick a few times and with my work schedule it's been 5 weeks.
So for the last month I've been trying to discern whether the baby is head up or down. Of course I have been hoping for the latter. I have consistently felt a hard sphere under my right ribs. And smaller parts like feet or arms flitting around on my left. I was a little concerned that what I felt on my right was the head since it is so firm. But I assumed it could just as easily be a bottom because right now the bottom probably doesn't have much padding.
I had a midwife at my church palpate may belly last week and she thought the baby was head down. And today my midwife said definitely head down.
So, it seems that it is a little bottom that keeps jostling up against my ribs and liver and little legs doing some sort of can-can routine on my left. I'm happy to hear that because the baby is not likely to turn back around now. But the s/he might be wondering who keeps pushing on his (her) behind. It's me! (Your mom!) And also sometimes your dad. And occasionally people at my work who want to feel the baby move.
I'm questioning whether this baby is a boy, a conviction (based on pure guess, admittedly) that I've had since the beginning. Almost everyone else also thinks it's a boy (again, based on nothing substantive). But everyone I know who has had a baby recently has had a boy. I know of five baby boys born in March. And two others who are expecting boys. Someone has to have a girl, right? I have a friend and a sister-in-law who are expecting girls. But a two to eight ratio doesn't seem right.
Though I only have knowledge of a small sample. I'm sure if I kept tabs of every baby born that it would be closer to 50%/50%. I'm doubting whether I'll have a boy yet I think I'll still be shocked if it's a girl. It has to be one or the other, right? But right now I'm doubting both! I'm a little concerned because I've been thinking boy so long that I've made myself hope for a boy (at first I didn't have a preference either way). However, last weekend I held an adorable, delectable little baby girl all frilled out in pink and sparkles with these long luxurious eyelashes and huge doe eyes. I found myself thinking that I would be just as happy with a girl. What am I saying? Of course I'll be happy with whatever baby I get! It's just right now with the theoretical baby that I've convinced myself that I'd be better with boys.
I realize I could've avoided all of this speculation if I had just found out the sex at one of our ultrasounds. But this is much more fun! I have truly enjoyed not knowing. Sometimes I feel like we live in a world saturated with too much information. I don't know if that makes sense but it's kind of nice to not know something for certain. Plus, I prefer all of the "neutral" colors to the hackneyed blue/pink routine.